The Festa dei Cuion is now in its 22nd year and can rightly be called a staple of the summer festival calendar in Gropparello, a quaint village nestled in the hills of Piacenza in northern Italy.
Festa dei Cuion roughly translates as the “Festival of the Dumbass”—a title that, sooner or later, applies to us all. On a literal level, "cuion" translates directly to testicles, or "bollocks" as the Sex Pistols would put it, with an illustration of testicles featured prominently on the event's original green commemorative t-shirts.
Celebrated every year on August 2nd to coincide with Festa degli Uomini (Italy's Men's Day), the festival embraces lighthearted self-deprecation and community camaraderie in equal measure.
The annual gathering culminates in its centerpiece tradition: crowning the official Dumbass of the Year. Far from an insult, the title represents a highly coveted achievement within the community, ensuring that love, enduring friendship, and good humor are forever bestowed upon the recipient.
Today, the festival is organised by the charity association
Promis Gruparel, a group of young local volunteers—a true band of brothers and sisters—who stage the live event while running the food and drink stalls. The current president is Marco Maggi, but the festival itself was founded more than 20 years ago by Federico Maggi, affectionately nicknamed “Il Chicco”, and his partner Roberta Gandolfi.
It has now grown into a free three-day music festival, beginning tonight, Friday 31/07, on a sweltering Italian summer evening. Held in the Gropparello football stadium, the atmosphere remains wonderfully comfortable, with a welcome breeze drifting across the crowd as people enjoy excellent food, cold drinks and, above all, the company of their fellow misfits.
First up are The Chains, a side project from Piacenza-based singer-songwriter Giorgia Cremona, who possesses both the talent and passion to become a successful recording artist. Joined by the accomplished Anita Battaglia on keyboards, the duo perform a set of covers tonight, with Giorgia putting her own stamp on songs such as “Poker Face”, “Call Me”, “All That She Wants”, “Don’t Look Back in Anger” and “Isn’t She Lovely”. The arrangements are inventive and engaging, delivered with soulful confidence and effortless panache.
The headline act is Legno, an Italian indie-pop duo that burst onto the scene in 2018. The group’s defining trademark is its unwavering commitment to anonymity: the two musicians, both from Tuscany, conceal their identities behind distinctive box masks at every performance. It’s a wonderfully eccentric concept and, to be honest, makes them fascinating to watch.
Performing under the tongue-in-cheek pseudonyms Legno Felice (Happy Wood) and Legno Triste (Sad Wood), the pair set out to subvert modern celebrity culture by allowing the music to speak entirely for itself.
And it certainly does. Backed by a three-piece band of bass, drums and guitar, they deliver a collection of well-crafted, melodic songs rooted firmly in classic Italian pop, with their youthful audience singing along. At one point they leap from the stage and into the crowd, their unmistakable box heads bobbing above the dancing throng. Songs such as “Spaccotutto”, “In (Gin) di Vita”, “Girotondo” and “Eroina” are clever, infectious pop nuggets, but they save perhaps their finest moments for the closing stretch with the dreamy “Affogare” and the sultry “Maionese”.
With DJ Angelo Galuppi keeping the music flowing into the early hours, the whole community—along with visitors from the surrounding towns, young and less young alike—comes together, smiles, laughter and conversation on every table. Tonight, it feels good to be a dumbass. With a full weekend still to come, things are definitely looking up.
Photo credit: Marco Gandolfi
