Rachel Platten has opened up about the postpartum depression that ruined her first year of motherhood.
The Fight Song singer gave birth to baby daughter Violet in January, 2019 and now admits she was not prepared for the mood swings that came with parenthood.
The 38 year old has taken to Instagram to reveal she hid the depression from fans, suffering from "shame and guilt" over the way she was feeling.
"I felt so sad that I'd missed out on special moments of bonding with her (daughter) while struggling with panic attacks and my mental health," Rachel writes. "My angel of a daughter deserved better."
She tells Good Morning America, "At some point the walls crumbled and I started having panic attacks and I'd never had them before."
She reveals her anxiety began on the road last summer (19): "I was miserable... I was trying to get enough milk, breastfeeding, to make her OK and then trying to entertain 15,000 people and trying to keep it together as a boss and try to be a good wife."
Rachel realised something was wrong and reached out to therapists.
"It took a minute to find the right one," she explains, "but when I did it was like getting the hug that I needed."
She also credits her husband, Kevin Lazan, for being strong enough to "sit there... while I'm going through what I'm going through".
And now Rachel is keen to help others, sharing her postpartum journey on social media and posting honest photos with fans - even when she's not looking or feeling her best.