Lady Gaga was on suicide watch when she first moved into Frank Zappa's old compound in Hollywood because close friends feared she would take her own life.
Speaking about her darkest moments from her Los Angeles home as part of a new CBS Sunday Morning TV interview, the Poker Face singer said: "The people around me, they lifted me up... I didn't really understand why I should live other than to be there for my family. That was an actual real thought and feeling."
She continued: "I lived in this house while people watched me for a couple of years to make sure I was safe."
Gaga, real name Stefani Germanotta, also explained she's a tad too fragile for fame at times, and called the popstar she has created her "biggest enemy".
"You can't go to the grocery store now, if you go to dinner with your family somebody comes to your table; you can't have a dinner with your family without it being about you. It's always about you... and your outfits: 'Why you gotta be like that'," she lamented.
Confessing she now struggles with panic attacks and full-body breakdowns when fans and paparazzi come up to her in public and take photos, Gaga described the ordeal as: "Just total panic, full body pain. I brace because I'm so afraid. It's like I'm an object. I'm not a person."
Despite her anguish, Gaga said she has pulled through.
"I don't hate Lady Gaga anymore. I found a way to love myself again," she reported.
